there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
