He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
