3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
