yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
