I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
sarcasm needs its own font
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
