We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
