how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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