Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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