love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
someone threw a dead crab at me
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
