There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
