It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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