Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
