Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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