At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
