Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize