I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
