You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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