oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize