Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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