is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
