maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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