i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
We left the knife in your bed.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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