im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
