Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
