Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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