I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
