I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
