is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'd cum for enchiladas.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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