Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
