Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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