So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
