I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
