i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
