she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
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