I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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