either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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