I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Randomize
