the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize