No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
