sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize