so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
