It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Randomize
