So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i barfeds in our rink
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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