It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
