You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
