it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
