tell your sister to shave her snatch
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize