i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
