Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work

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(314): View more from Missouri

Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.

(314): View more from Missouri

Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.

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(801): View more from Utah

Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.

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