I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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