We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I don't deserve a penis
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
