You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
